Sorry for the radio silence. I’ve been taking a bit of well deserved time out from all things fertility related.
From starting the IVF process in March 2015 we were pretty much either doing or preparing/waiting for IVF/FETs non-stop from then until June 2016. 3 IVFs, 2 FETs and one redundancy later I knew that I needed to let go for a bit. Let go of the relentless fertility diet and permanent guilt after eating sugar or drinking a glass of wine. Let go of the relentless planning around possible procedures (and putting the rest of life on hold). Let go of the seriousness of the situation. Let go of constantly researching possible factors in out infertility. Let go of everything.
And I’m pleased to say that I’ve managed it. I started my new job in July which has kept me busy in a good way. I’ve been out partying with friends, to music festivals to old friends’ weddings and had a lot of fun. There have been some down days of course…but the letting go had helped me get some perspective on things. I’m still alive and however things work out I want to make the most of my life. I’ve laughed more in the last month than I had done in 2.5 years….And it really really helps heal those wounds a little.
Having said that I haven’t given up on fertility stuff completely and have managed to progress things a bit in the meantime, which I’ll leave to another post. But for now I’ve been focusing on enjoying the summer…and it feels really really good.
I’ll be back on reading posts this week and catching up with you all. Hugs to all.